The Things I have learned....

I found this website called "Things I have learned so far in my Life".  It has kept me thinking about many things.

My weekend in pictures

Had breakfast with a dear friend on Saturday morning.  We had a long talk and a few laughs.  

Played a game of Pool with my husband, brother, and sister in law.  I suck at it!! Big time....

... my niece watched us wondering what the hell we were doing...

And tonight, after my photography class, I saw the big bright moon shining above me.  I managed to take this picture while driving.

Wishing you a happy and productive week....

Me. Without glasses.

I'm trying out a new pair of contact lenses.  It's been a while.  In fact, I haven't wore contact lenses ever since I moved away from my island three years ago.  So I'm still adjusting to my new sight.  Things look smaller when I'm wearing glasses.  I guess the shape of the glass shrinks the images somehow.  I asked a friend of mine who wear glasses if he had notice this before.  He agreed with my observation.

It's funny how people react to appearances.  Nobody at work had seen me before without this obvious object in my face, so it was a shock for some people.

"You look different!"  Duuuhh. Really?

"Your eyes are green!" Well, hazel actually. Today they just look greener than usual.  And this was a girl with whom I have daily interaction.  Didn't she notice before? 

"You look great!" That's the kind of compliment I want to hear to keep me encouraged.

I remember the exact moment I started seeing blurry.  I was eight, I think, and I was in my third grade classroom, writing down some notes on my notebook.  The teacher had written some stuff on the chalkboard that we had to copy.  I was looking back and forth, from the board to my notebook.  At one point, when I was reading the board, something pop in my eyes, and they got teary.  I rubbed them hard, and when I tried to read from the chalkboard again, I couldn't see a thing!

For many years, I hated wearing glasses.  I thought I looked stupid, ugly and nerdy.  And of course, when you get to your teen years, you must look like everybody else.  You want to fit in.  So, as soon as I turned 13, I got my first set of contact lenses. Oh I was so happy.  I wore them all the time, neglecting my poor glasses, leaving them on the side, on some dusty corner.

I rediscovered them some years ago.  I had to get a new prescription and, while waiting for my turn in the eye glasses shop, I spotted a nice, clean looking pair that got my attention.  I tried them on and they fit perfectly.  So I changed my mind and got them instead.  I've been enjoying the simplicity and practicality of eye glasses for quite a while now.  But after three years, I want  to update my look.  And this is the fastest and most efficient way I know.

Story of a Child

Yesterday I read an article on Newsweek that moved me.  It was titled Family Portraits, and the subject really took me by surprise. This is the article's description:

"A unique volunteer group helps parents preserve precious images of babies that are stillborn or expected to die soon after birth."

Motherhood is a sensitive subject for me to discuss.  Not because I'm not interested on becoming one, but because I've been trying for five years without success.  I've been through all the stages: from total excitement about the new endeavor, to disappointment and frustration.  Right now, I'm in the "I don't really care" stage, and I am trying to enjoy my life to the fullest, getting involved on things that are dear to me.  But there was a moment, a brief period in which I was able to conceive, and the experience was magical.

I was still living in my island, and I had recently changed doctors.  This new guy took a new approach to the situation, and after two months on treatment, the oh-so-hated pregnancy test finally came back POSITIVE.  I just couldn't believe my eyes, and I did two more tests just to make sure it wasn't a cruel joke from the circumstances.  The doctor confirmed it with an ultrasound, and I had the first photo of my baby.  It was blurry and you couldn't see a baby still, but it was my baby alright.  The happiness that surrounded our house was like any other, making plans, talking about it all the time, hopeful about our future together.  Then I went to my next appointment the following month, only to find out that there was no heartbeat.  The baby never made it past the second month.  For me, the most hurting memory of that moment was to see my husband cry.  In ten years I've only seen him cry once, and that was it.  I'm really sorry I haven't been able to give him a child... and it really breaks my heart every time I think about it.

So when I read this article, the idea of photographing a stillborn baby comes to me as a beautiful gift.  Because, for whatever brief or long the moment is, it was your baby, it was your child.  Holding on to those images means that this little person existed and it made an impact on your life. And no one will ever take that away from you.

Gone...not for so long

I had been quiet for some time now.  Regrouping, putting things in the right perspective.  Last week was a long and tough week, at work and home.  Since my two coworkers were laid off, we had acquire more responsibilities than we had before, so that took some adjustments.  That's done.  At home, I had been helping my brother and his wife to set up their own design freelance business.  Color Depth Design is already on its way to become a full production business.  I sat down with my sister in law and covered all the basics.  She already started working on her first project, so she's been busy.

My photography class starts this next weekend, and I'm looking forward to it.    I need to tackle the technicalities of flash photography if I ever want to make some money out of this hobby of mine.  I'm also working on building my portfolio.  I have been reading a lot on the subject and I think I know what I want to do.  In the meantime you can check out my photoblog, Think!Photography.  I'll be doing some updates on the layout, so new things are coming their way.